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7 things women do that drive men mad
ian o b
(438 Posts)
Posted:
30-May-2012 12:20
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Annoying female habit 1: Making an anniversary out of everything
What is it with women turning the nice little things in life into a grand gift-exchanging, champagne-popping ceremony? We return home from a normal day at work to be met with a candle-lit dinner and an expensive looking gift but, quite frankly, it makes our heart stop. Have you done something wrong? Is it your birthday? My birthday? Oh silly me, it’s the anniversary of the first time we looked at each other. Please refrain from doing this, ladies. We have a hard enough time getting event dates right without being shouted at for not buying the dog a card to celebrate the anniversary of his first vaccination.
Annoying female habit 2: Piling the bed with cushions
One would be mistaken for thinking that a bed is for sleeping in. We go to get our head down for the night, only to find the bed piled sky-high with strategically placed cushions that leave no room for us. What’s more, only a couple of these cushions actually have a purpose. We don’t need the tiny heart-shaped one or the big fluffy one that makes us sneeze – just a normal pillow to rest our head on will suffice. We don’t adorn the bed with DIY tools and model cars, so please tame your OCD (Obsessive Cushion Disorder) and stop making an elaborate display out of our bed so we can get down to the important stuff.
Annoying female habit 3: Asking us what we’re thinking
It’s a classic example of how women like to test us, and possibly trick us into making the cardinal sin of admitting that we weren’t thinking about her at that particular moment. One minute we’re enjoying a cuddle, the next they’re hurling that question at us when we’re least expecting it. They say it so fast that we don’t have chance to make up a false reply or even to think straight, which leads us to stutter and then be accused of thinking of our ex. Asking what we’re thinking is basically a nice way of saying ‘you aren’t allowed to have private thoughts, unless they’re about me’.
Annoying female habit 4: Saying ‘I’m fine’, when you’re not happy
So she stood in front of the television while the football was on, we got a bit iffy and snapped, and now all sorts of issues have been bought up. Then she says it – that passive-aggressive statement that marks the start of the dreaded silent treatment: “I’m fine”. Erm, are you really fine because you’ve just screamed at us until you’ve gone red in the face, and now you’re laying face down on the bed crying. If you’re unhappy just outline the problem and then we can sort it out and carry on as normal. Or – even better – don’t outline the problem and let us watch the football in peace.
Annoying female habit 5: Using sex as a weapon
One of the most annoying things that a woman can do is deny her man of sexual privileges. Some women seem to take great pleasure in using our weakness to their own advantage through the classic ‘if you don’t do this, we’re not having sex’ scenario. If you’re going to stop us from doing one thing, please don’t let it be sex. We don’t stop you from eating and drinking, so please don’t mess with our basic human needs either.
Annoying female habit 6: Being over-emotional
You cry at funerals, you cry at weddings, you cry at happy films, you cry at sad films. This makes us feel awkward because we just don’t know what to say or do when you’re sat sobbing all over our freshly ironed shirt. Where do all these tears come from? We think women should just have an annual crying day where they get together and cry for twenty four hours, before coming home and being normal for the other 364 days of the year. It would solve a lot of our problems.
Annoying female habit 7: Incessant talking
We’ve heard that women are estimated to say around 20, 000 words a day – which is an awful lot compared to the paltry 7, 000 estimated for men – so we understand that she needs to get her daily nattering fix, but why is it always at the most inappropriate times? She was quiet all the way through the family dinner when we needed her to break the awkward silence, but as soon as we start getting to the competitive part of a multi-player game with our friends, she just won’t shut up about how cute the neighbour’s cat looks when it sits next to the rose bush. To make it even more annoying, the actual part of the story she was getting at whilst rambling on about the neighbour’s cat, was that the cat’s owner now works at the grocery store down the road. Ladies, if you’re going to talk, pick the right moment and please, just get to the point. Read more on realbuzz.com...
bluelim
(408 Posts)
Posted:
30-May-2012 12:40
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So in the past.
Glór na ngael
(1,198 Posts)
Posted:
30-May-2012 12:52
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Whoever wrote this sounds like a bit of a misogynist, TBH.
theface2010
(3,490 Posts)
Posted:
30-May-2012 12:53
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Having the painters in when you stumble in the door after a feed of pints on a Friday night primed and ready for action.
Blanco
(7,909 Posts)
Posted:
30-May-2012 12:54
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Originally posted by Glór na ngael:
Whoever wrote this sounds like a bit of a misogynist, TBH.
It's old hat at this stage , but there is nothing in it that is untrue for about at least 90% of women out there.
carryharry
(4,804 Posts)
Posted:
30-May-2012 12:58
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I smell a Buke or a Film out of this!
murraymarmalade
(2,008 Posts)
Posted:
30-May-2012 12:59
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The post of the year by Man with the cap applies here
Anyone but FF
(1,490 Posts)
Posted:
30-May-2012 13:14
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Constantly buying shoes that they wear only once.
Constantly buying shoes that are too high for them and then complaining that their shoes are uncomfortable and they cant walk in them.
Going out on cold nights without a jacket or a jumper and then asking you could they take yours.
Watching pure rubbish on tv like expose, then turning over to the E channel and watching Keeping up with the Kardishans, Ice loves Coco, Chloe and Lamar and other such sh!te.
Texting you while your out for pints with the lads. "Hows your night going" Nothing more annoying then having to reply to texts while your out.
Their friends who don't get the whole club GAA scene, "Is ABFF coming out Sat night" "No he has championship Sunday" "Cant he come out for a while anyway he doesnt have to drink too much"
Trying and failing to set up one of your friends with her fat heap of a friend and then saying " I cant understand why Fiona cant get a man, she has such a nice personality" Maybe its because Fiona weighs about 18 stone, drinks pints of Guinness and lists Burger King as her favourite restaurant.
carryharry
(4,804 Posts)
Posted:
30-May-2012 13:18
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" I cant understand why Fiona cant get a man, she has such a nice personality" Maybe its because Fiona weighs about 18 stone, drinks pints of Guinness and lists Burger King as her favourite restaurant.
So true!
Wonderful Fabalous
(103 Posts)
Posted:
30-May-2012 14:25
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The Only B Word You Should Call A Girl Is Beautiful.
Bitches Love To Be Called Beautiful.
RoyalGirl
(1,587 Posts)
Posted:
30-May-2012 16:21
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Originally posted by theface2010:
Having the painters in when you stumble in the door after a feed of pints on a Friday night primed and ready for action.
The cheek of them... You'd swear they do it just to spite you
BeTimberin
(2,458 Posts)
Posted:
30-May-2012 17:06
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Originally posted by Wonderful Fabalous:
The Only B Word You Should Call A Girl Is Beautiful. Bitches Love To Be Called Beautiful.
Ha ha ha
cowpat
(1,540 Posts)
Posted:
30-May-2012 20:08
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Originally posted by carryharry:
" I cant understand why Fiona cant get a man, she has such a nice personality" Maybe its because Fiona weighs about 18 stone, drinks pints of Guinness and lists Burger King as her favourite restaurant. So true!
You know you are in trouble when you enquire after a bird "What's she like?", and they answer "she's very bubbly, got a great personality". You know then she is a heap.......
Hitch
(3,644 Posts)
Posted:
30-May-2012 20:49
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Annoying female habit 2: Piling the bed with cushions
Lotsa fun to be had in bed using cushions!
Fintan Franks
(266 Posts)
Posted:
30-May-2012 22:07
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Love women so I do.
mandarin
(412 Posts)
Posted:
30-May-2012 22:07
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Just one will do Hitch.
BellShafted
(1,123 Posts)
Posted:
30-May-2012 22:40
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Another old one but always worth another read:
HER DIARY
Tonight I thought he was acting weird. We had made plans to meet at a bar to have a drink. I was shopping with my friends all day long, so I thought he was upset at the fact that I was a bit late, but he made no comment.
Conversation wasn't flowing so I suggested that we go somewhere quiet so we could talk. He agreed but he kept quiet and absent. I asked him what was wrong; he said nothing. I asked him if it was my fault that he was upset. He said it had nothing to do with me and not to worry. On the way home I told him that I loved him, he simply smiled and kept driving. I can't explain his behavior; I don't know why he didn't say, "I love you too."
When we got home I felt as if I had lost him, as if he wanted nothing to do with me anymore. He just sat there and watched T.V. He seemed distant and absent. Finally, I decided to go to bed. About 10 minutes later he came to bed, and to my surprise he responded to my caress and we made love, but I still felt that he was distracted and his thoughts were somewhere else. He fell asleep - I cried.
I don't know what to do. I'm almost sure that his thoughts are with someone else. My life is a disaster.
HIS DIARY
Sh!t day at work. Got laid though.
Prof Honeydew
(748 Posts)
Posted:
31-May-2012 00:05
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Nagging you for weeks to fix the hairdryer, cut down the tree that's blocking the view or move the furniture around to some new location that hasn't been figured out yet and then, when your resistance finally cracks, telling you you're doing it wrong before you even start.
scelp
(1,695 Posts)
Posted:
31-May-2012 10:33
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Ms Scelp does a few things that drive me mad...ooooohhhhhh yeeeaaahhhh...
Bad day when our women dont try a few things to blow our minds....
No need for crude responses, unless they're witty...
N16
(1,724 Posts)
Posted:
31-May-2012 11:08
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In the gym, 2 things:
1. Watching loads of them kop-out. Walking on a trednmill isnt exercise and wont lsoe that fat ar$e. Neither will the thigh strengthening machines - in fact, you only use them when you're toning musscles that are already fit, fatties.
2. Wasting valuable time on the weight machines operating them at the lowest possible weight. And thinking that its good exercise.
3. Wasting time on an exercise bike while texting their friends. On the lowest possible resistance as well and not a bead of sweat.
Been in gyms for eyars and its always the same. Nearly every fella in ther eis putting in a shift and working hard. Buit I'd say easily 50% of the women are not, just kopping out, going there to feel good so they can come home and update their Facebook status with "went to the gym" to impress their friends. And cant understand it when their lard ar$es are still hanging off them.
I know how I'd get rid of the flab if they gave me the same money they're wasting on gyms. I'd get them to run 4 miles every night of the week and I'd follow them with an ash plant and wear it into their ar$es if they were going too slow or trying to kop out.
And another thing, talking about diets. Going around talking about going on diets. y mother was always on a diet, and my sister and Mrs N16 has gone on diets and to weight watchers. Pure and utter kop out. yeah, eat healthy but dont be afraid of working hard to get rid of the flab and forget thinking it'll work out of you starve yourself to death.
Dont get me wrong, I see some exceptionally fit hard working girls and women in the gym, hats off to them. But compared to men, I see a massively disproportionate amount of women in there looking to take the easy option and wasting time on machines people need who are actually going to use properly and work a sweat up in the process.
Eddie Batt
(820 Posts)
Posted:
31-May-2012 11:16
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Attempting to hoover when there is a match/race on the telly that you have a serious interest in.
busdriver
(999 Posts)
Posted:
31-May-2012 12:48
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1 presentation,toilet rolls ,soap,towels,tea towels etc wtf?
2 driving need i elaborate?
3 reality tv shows omg
4 the hairdo senario and all it involves
there are many more but mrs busdriver reads this sometimes so i better just leave sleeping dogs lie at this stage
N16
(1,724 Posts)
Posted:
31-May-2012 13:00
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Originally posted by Eddie Batt:
Attempting to hoover when there is a match/race on the telly that you have a serious interest in.
Another thing that drives me mad. We have a shelf books and stuff behind the tele and she always seems to have to go rummaging for something on the shelf when there's a match on.
Which means she has to go in front of the tele as the tele is right in front of the shelves.
Sean Mc Dermotts
(396 Posts)
Posted:
31-May-2012 13:13
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No sympathy ES, you should have had the foresight not to put the shelves behind the telly, silly boy!
moycullen14
(550 Posts)
Posted:
31-May-2012 13:15
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Originally posted by theface2010:
Having the painters in when you stumble in the door after a feed of pints on a Friday night primed and ready for action.
It's referred to as 'fully reared' in this parish!
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